As my kid was slamming the car door yelling. “ Mom I hate you”, I realized teaching your kids to drive is a lot like natural childbirth. All that breathing sounds like a good idea until the first contraction, its damn the torpedoes and every man for himself.

I wanted the driving lesson to turn out differently. Perhaps me clutching the dashboard, saying the rosary didn’t instill confidence.

In my day, it was different. We wrote a test, got our license in the afternoon, drove on the big highway that night.

Today they have this G1 and G2 and Gee Mom stop yelling I need to go the speed limit.

The rules have changed. We had to learn to park on a hill. Was it wheels turned in on the down slope or was it out on the up? I still don’t get that right. Today there are no hills. There’s only mall parking. They have to do perpendicular parking and be able to back in between the two white lines. I was out there flagging her in thinking you’re never going to do this once you pass your test. By the way a big apology to a green van at Centre Square mall.

After a few crying incidents, her crying, me driving along side of her, saying, “ Get in the damn car you can’t walk all the way home.” I decided to hire a driving instructor; an insured-driving teacher. Why risk your life when for a few hundred dollars, someone will do it for you? They have massive amounts of training in not freaking out. While I’ve had massive amount of training in freaking out.

Then she got her license, and it was bye- bye car. She took the chevy to the levy and brought the gas tank empty. And I was at home feeling like I was stuck in inside that Harry Chapin song, Cats in the Cradle.

Everyone has a story to tell. Tell yours in the beautiful setting of Amherst island. Whether you’re a new writer or an experienced one this workshop is inspiring, safe and guarantees to get your creative juices flowing.

Deborah Kimmett writes for CBC Radio, Canadian Living and Winnipeg Comedy Festival. She’s a 20 year veteran of the Second City and is a Governor General Award nominated author.

“Deborah’s so full of insight, the workshop was like sipping at a fire hydrant.” Bob Laroque.

Saturday April 10th, 2010 - 10-4 pm

Amherst Island Studio

$100 plus GST

Free will offering

For details email deborah@kimmett.ca

Tickets $ 25
t: 613.476.8416
http://theregenttheatre.org

Oakville Centre for the Performing Arts in Oakville Ontario

Click here to purchase tickets.

www.kingstonlife.ca